Celebration, "bragging," and the blissful art of self-fullness ✨
Not a humblebrag wrapped in self-deprecating humor. Not a quiet, polite "oh, thanks, it was nothing." But a full-bodied, unapologetic, “I did that, and it felt fucking fantastical” moment?
In our culture, bond-by-commiseration is the default setting. I see it all the time at social gatherings—especially among women, where the conversational baseline so often defaults to complaining about husbands and partners. We air the frustrations, the domestic weight, the grievances. But how often do we sit around a table and talk about our relationship discoveries? Our sexual empowerment? Our personal accomplishments, or how we actively navigated a challenge in our partnership and came out stronger on the other side?
Hear me: there is real, necessary value in holding space for grief, frustration, and the messy parts of life with the people closest to us. We need those safe landing pads. But commiseration isn't the only way to connect.
Growing up, I was often confused by the rules around celebration. We were taught to go all-out for commercial holidays and capitalistic occasions, yet strictly instructed to dim our own personal light. Don’t brag. Don’t sing too beautifully. Don’t dance too proudly. Celebrate the calendar, celebrate everyone else, but never celebrate yourself. It didn't make sense to me as a child, and it still doesn't.
Luckily, my parents did show me how to celebrate deeply in community, and over time I’ve had to make sense of it all on my own terms. I call it self-fullness—the blissful art of being fully present with myself and honoring my own existence, whether I'm soaring or stumbling. Because even when things go sideways, I like to remind myself: hey, at least I didn’t shit my pants. 😂
Loudly celebrating myself and others isn't arrogant—it’s an anchor. It’s what keeps me connected to my body, to the world around me, and to the living, breathing rhythms of joy and pleasure.
It’s how we stay attuned to what actually turns us on about being alive: good food, deep hugs, rich touch, ridiculous humor, and profound closeness. For me, honoring those rhythms has expanded into a life rich with kissing my friends, cuddle puddles, teaching pleasure and sexuality, skating like the sexy freak that I am, burlesque, and building fantastical relationships that refuse to fit into any neat little box.
Speaking of nourishing connection...
Our last Cuddle Lab was proof of what happens when we give ourselves permission to lean into collective pleasure and presence. It was deeply nourishing, profound, and deliciously intoxicating—we were practically swimming in the full spectrum of feel-good hormones. There is something truly magical about creating a container where we can slow down, practice explicit consent, and just be held.
I’m already buzzing for our next gathering, and I would love to have you in the space with us.
Next Cuddle Lab Date: OCTOBER 9, 2026
Time: 6:00 PM - 9:30 PM
Location: 301 Broad St Upstairs Nevada City, CA
Grab your spot here: Partiful/Registration Link
When I was little, I believed that every single one of us was our own universe. I still believe that. Each of us is an intricate, complex cosmos—and every universe deserves discovery, deep exploration, wild celebration, and glorious acknowledgment.
So here is my invitation to you today: What is hot in your world right now? What are you proud of? What is going ridiculously, beautifully right?
Reply to this email and tell me your wins—big, small, or delightfully spicy. Let’s practice taking up space in our pleasure together.
